Unity

A collage is made when cuttings which vary in size, shape and colour are put together meticulously, piece by piece, until a bigger image is formed. Prior to the finished work is the process of sticking these papers which by themselves, bear no logical sense or aesthetic value unto a big sheet or canvas. In isolation, an insignificant, tiny piece of coloured paper is of little value. At a close range, one barely sees a meaningful image when looking at these cuttings. From a distance, the collage, made up by tiny, insignificant pieces makes perfect sense.

Unity must never be carelessly equated with similarity, or mere common-ness. To achieve homogeneity (a state in which a group of people are found to be uniform in characteristics and are like-minded to each other) is to achieve nothing more than a comfortable place of similarity. There is no synergy here; there isn't a 'team' of people, rather a ritualistic and bland condition people succumb to which they call 'unity'. On the other hand, to completely advocate 'diversity' may sometimes be folly; we cannot embrace anything under the sun that is right, and wrong too. Unity is more that this.

Wars at all levels, from the domestic to the international have been fought because of this very struggle: to embrace the differences, or to stand up against the unacceptable. We know today, many of these wars were justifiable, just as well as we know some of them should never have been fought. We hear unity preached and bellowed from the dim classrooms of our schools to the living rooms where our televisions are.

What seems to be lacking however is the understanding that unity is not a single coloured sheet of paper, but a collage of sorts. Yellow and brown are different, yet when put together as one, they present a common picture. The educators need to know: achieving unity is NOT by making the people homogeneous through the pages of national History books. The governments need to realise: too much of a single colour ruins the collage. Friends need to see: 'different' is not necessarily 'opposition'. Legalists need to tell apart: tolerance and compromise. To say, "my team is not united because its members are too different from each other" is a false idea. There is only unity where diversity comes together.

"You're never closer to defeat as when you are in victory"

To ponder upon. I pray hype and temporary excitement will not get to us; because a lifelong commitment to die to selfish dreams and lofty desires is what makes it all truly worth it.

Cats

Truly live

"The paralysis of refusing to act leaves a man exactly where he was before; when once he acts, he is never the same.
The moments when I truly live are the moments when I act with my whole will"

-Oswald Chambers (My Utmost of His Highest)
(One of my favourite authors)

...But we must not obsess about 'acting', without rightly acting.

"Who is the judge?"
"The judge is God."
"Why is he God?"
"Because he decides who wins or loses. Not my opponent."
"Who is your opponent?"
"He does not exist."
"Why does he not exist?"
"Because he is a mere dissenting voice of the truth I speak"
-The Great Debaters (2007)

Liberal? (applying post-structuralism into a moral context)

In the last few weeks of classes some of us have been subjected to the grueling idea of post-structuralism (and wondering whether we really do exist if ‘reality is a matter of production’). In taking a double-degree, I find the Business course solid and pretty objective, while the School of Arts and Humanities offers many interesting discourses to chew on (and spit out). Nevertheless, the latter provides many lenses with which to look at life and to ponder about certain realities. p.s. Will post again after my exams (ending on 4th of Nov).

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The idea of post-structuralism fits well in this age of expressionism. Prevalent in every form of written/oral communication are thousands of attempts to express emotions of some sort by individuals who desire to be heard and known. This very web page, an outlet of expression and thought, is no different from the millions of blog pages around the world- it only guises itself in a less personal way than the average Ah Lian blog. Some present their expressions in the guise of clever thoughts, some in profound pictures, some in narratives; but in essence, all have the same basis- to make a statement of some kind for others to be aware of. Otherwise, blog pages will not be blog pages- they will be saved Microsoft Word files safely stored in a personal folder.

Post-structuralism finds its roots in the fact that all meaning is reduced to language, for we cannot think without first forming our thoughts through the medium of language. Because no thought could be made without the inevitable influence of language, post-modernism says all meaning may be deconstructed. In summary, the 'truth' behind meaning is irrelevant in a post-modernist world because we can construct 'reality' by the use of language.

If this is true, the world we live in is one flooded with messages which bear unstable meanings, for they could be interpreted in any way and may be used in any way. This is daunting, because this negates any truth. More importantly, this means many things are ‘relative’ and non-absolutes.

Yet, this idea fits perfectly in our expressionist world, where the 'liberal' are glorified and the conservative, stoic ideas are perceived to be 'closed and narrow' ways. This is the convention of the world today- any truth could be seen in any way. Any code could be read in any way, and therefore, moral codes are not absolutes, for they have relative meanings and are to be interpreted in a relative manner. Individuality reigns supreme, and 'one man's meat is another man's poison'. We live in a relative world.

Where, then, can we find ‘truth’ in a post-modern world, where one's own rights are fought for (often out of sheer selfishness) and "human rights" are glorified (often excessively and naively) and where the righteous are always 'stiff and up-tight' while the liberal are always 'open-minded'?

After all, history itself has shown that humankind requires absolutes to function. From the dawn of time, laws have been made and re-made for one reason: to limit human activity and to draw the line. Humankind needs borders in order not to ‘cross the line’- and borders are absolutes to be obeyed. Why is it, that the immediate reaction to a ruthless case of rape is usually the demand that the perpetrator be punished severely according to the law?

The waves of this age of post-modernism may bring to many a sense of liberation from the 'weights of moral and social codes', but we must never be too enthralled by the spirit of liberation, especially when it is used loosely and when it is the excuse for decadence.

It was the 'weights', after all, that built the strong man, not the sense of liberation.

Be right back

The absence of any writing here is by no means a sign of a loss of interest; it is only due to the fact that between what I have to do and what I want to do, the former takes precedence. I will write here again soon...

"You do what you need to do, to do what you want to do"

The river goes to places of which its source will never dream of reaching.

The extent of our services or actions for other people may go further than the immediate results we are aware of.

We will keep learning

As a matter of honour, if you’re a member of a team, submit yourself to your authority as you would expect submission from your team under you

As a matter of honour, you don’t pull a punch on someone when he/she’s turned away, or conspire among other social circles

As a matter of honour, you speak straightforwardly and uncompromisingly, directly- one to one- and the buck stops there

As a matter of honour, you unflinchingly refuse to take sides within the same team, should it happen, for the maintained unity and well-being of the team

As a matter of honour, you don’t allow yourself to believe all that is said about another teammate, especially if it induces prejudice or disrespect for him/her

As a matter of honour, you show the same grace to your teammates as you would receive it from them for your own shortcomings

As a matter of honour, you don’t fight fire with fire, or unfairness with unfairness- because it is already enough that the mistake has been made

As a matter of honour, others' shortcomings must never be forum discussions or unnecessary e-mail threads, or coffee talk

And

if performing the above puts you in a less than desired position, you try to do them anyway- accepting the hard lessons - as a matter of honour.

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-To tickle your funny bones... :> One of my favourite YouTube videos

When You Ask Her About Monsters

Happy 20th

To Han Sheng who has been a dear buddy to me in all the years of our academic lives: SKDU (primary school), SMDU (secondary school), HELP (pre-uni), and presently, Monash University.

(...and unless the trend is proven otherwise, it looks like there will be more pictures like this taken of him, years from now.)

Flag bearers

Personal reflection (faith)

The war stories tell of soldiers who march out to face their enemies and perish by the blade of the sword or the bullet of the gun. Some march out valiantly, some march out reluctantly, but the bullets don't favor anyone. At the battlefield, a prominent soldier carries in his arms the pride of the army, and the spirit behind their foolish march onward: the flag. He knows very well that everyone in the opposition will take their aim to bring him down, just as everyone behind him will take their aim to kill the other flag bearer. But he also knows of other foolish ones like him who wait to pick up the flag when that happens.

The flag bearers in the war know that they run into their deaths for representing their army and taunting their opponents, if only for a few moments. They don't whine when the bullet meets the flesh- they subscribed for it. They don't quit at the prospect of being shot. They share the same fate of their commander-in-chief, in victory or in suffering.

Likewise in the matter of faith, the flags we carry bring, and will bring

slander, false accusations/labeling, punishment for standing up to the right thing, betrayal, rejection, disrespect, mockery, deception, being used, abuse, assault, misrepresentation...

..but grace abounds for us to march on.

Just a quick follow-up to the post below particularly regarding the scholarship and education system in Malaysia. Some facts to consider (*taken from unicef, unescap) that prompted my questions:

• About half of the youth in Malaysia are not 'urban' youth.
• Only 29 % of the Malaysian youth between 15-23 have a tertiary education
• Only 34 Indian youth received the PSD overseas scholarships this year (NST 15th May)
• 25% of average Malaysian families survive on a household earning of less than RM 1000 a month (quoted in the Eighth Malaysian Plan)

I read with interest an interview with the Public Service director-general in the newspaper today, and think some steps taken should be rightfully applauded, like the steps taken to punish government-funded students who study overseas and refuse to return home to serve the country (a total waste of our tax-payers money):

"Before 2003, if you broke your bond, you or your guarantor had to pay. The amount was less than what was spent on you. But now, the penalty is the actual cost (of what was spent on the student). So, before this, if you were doing medicine, you had to pay RM160,000, which is less than a year’s scholarship. We spend RM1.2 million for each medical student. But over 90 per cent of our students come back. The ones who don’t come back are mostly medical students. If they don’t come back, we get their guarantors." - Tan Sri Ismail Adam

That being said, my opinion stems from the logic that monetary aid can benefit two groups of Malaysian youth:

1) The group that applies for a scholarship/loan and, if rejected, can still afford to pursue tertiary education

2) The group that applies for a scholarship/loan and, if rejected, cannot afford to pursue tertiary education

This was not covered in the interview, and my contention is that the criteria points-system of 70- academic excellence, 10- interview, 10- family economic background and 10- co-curricular activities, should be revised in favour of the lower-income earning groups. The second group should be given priority, and not just a mere 10 points bonus. Hey, some youth are already getting more pocket-money than 25% of all the families in the country (imagine 5 family members per family) every month.

According to the 8th MP, only 9.8% of Malaysian families have a household income of more than RM 5000 (the top of the income class). Let's assume these people can afford to send their kids to universities.

If one makes a further assumption that in each family there is 1 youth, 90 out of 100 youth in Malaysia are born to families that earn less than RM5000 a month. The lower the income groups get, the more difficult it is to support youth planning to pursue their education. Why give so much money to the top of the income classes who can afford it, when the bottom can barely get by with daily necessities and deserve this more? Which is more pressing- award according to merit (easily attained by the rich who have resources available to them) or aid for the poorer groups? Giving more money to the rich who already have the resources to study and who don't really need it is another form of elitism, I'm afraid.

Just consider: Rm 1000 per month, shared between 5 family members who have to eat, pay for school/electricity/water/petrol/rent bills... and then compare it to your monthly spending as an 'urban' youth.

Do things make sense? This is the world we'll live in for the next 50 or so years. The world of 6.6 billion, out of which 1.1 billion live on less than US$ 1 a day.

No sense

The main challenge of the current generation here lies not in the poverty of the land, nor in the inadequate resources available to us to live comfortable lives. No, by the toil and economic struggles of the generations before us, this generation was born into a world of convenience, luxury and extravagance; and our challenge is of a different type. Set on the road to success, most of us traverse along the path of materialism and glory forgetting that we leave several precious things behind as well. And thus some things no longer make sense...

It doesn't make sense that some entertainment programs are structured in a way that puts an entity or person down in order to elevate another. Many of the salient themes on the television consist of those that condemn lousy cars, lousy food or lousy people, ignorant of the context in which they are found: lousy cars serve to provide cheap and affordable transportation for the middle-class citizens, lousy food is good enough to fill the stomachs of those who do not afford escargots and Wellington steaks, and lousy talent does not stop people from being happy singing or dancing. Yet, imperfection is capitalized upon, and our comedy is another's tragedy. It doesn't make sense that this happens in the same world whose inhabitants suffer and lose their lives to catastrophes and human injustice.

It doesn't make sense that in a nation that faces a brain-drain problem, generous scholarships are awarded to the already rich and privileged (whose wealth could purchase them the best schools, books and teachers) or to a select race or group- at the expense of the equally competent, only less privileged and their rights to education to fulfill a pathetic quota. The poor drop out of schools and dream a distant dream of a tertiary education while the rich are sent to expensive foreign universities by government funding , where they obtain their degrees and often times, eventually stay on and become even richer, not wanting to return and work for the nation; some even scoffing at the incompetence of their homeland and exalting the cultures they weren’t born to. And while this is not a generalization of all the 'rich', it doesn't make sense that a government that aims to get as many people educated as possible in order to increase human capital could fail in delivering subsidies and financial aid to the people who need them the most.

It doesn't make sense that 'cats prefer to bark'; and when Malaysians perceive anything non-Malaysian to be more superior. When the very dreams our parents instilled in us involve working hard, to study overseas, to stay there and have good lives- we are nothing short of Malaysians with an identity crisis. While they mean well, some forget that they cheat the country of its voices, by sending them away. It doesn't make sense that an average and fairly blessed country with problems not unlike other countries is perceived to be a place to escape from. When Englishmen could be so proud of their country, or Americans boast about their home, and when both countries are flawed in their own ways- what a sin it is to be discontented with a beautiful country like ours! There is a difference between realizing our country's lack and the need to improve, and pure discontentment and cynicism.

Oh, many things don't make sense today, but when people realize these disparities in logic, they must stand up in their own ways. Malaysian youth must be proud citizens, proud of who they were born to be, and proud of who they are. Those who stay back must realize their privilege to do so, while those who leave temporarily must be effective ambassadors of this land.
We must all have a passion for our land, our families, our loved ones and our roots - to help make sense, and most of all, we must love who God made us to be.

Not a matter of when, but how

"All men die; not all men really live"
-Braveheart

Unsung heroes

A display of sheer gut and spirit. I am more than impressed and challenged. The irony of stories like these is many of us, privileged ones, would probably be more interested in Paris Hilton and her chihuahua, never once hearing of extraordinary, inspiring individuals like her, who put us all who have hands to shame. Life is put into a proper perspective, just watching these unsung heroes live their lives...

The 4 letter word

“Stubbornness” always carries negative connotations, but at times it seems to me that love takes the form of stubbornness when the rainbows and laughter fade. How much is one capable of being stretched to love, despite circumstances that provide justification for ‘returning the punch’ rather than ‘turning the other cheek’? Against all opposition, accusations, prejudice, misunderstanding, differences, contrasting ideologies, backgrounds, colour, abilities (or the lack of), time (or the lack of), how far can one continue to love relentlessly until the limit is breached- if there should be a limit?

The more I think about it the more it occurs to me that this concerns all levels- from the national to the simple, everyday friendships. I can only aspire to love like Christ

Richard the Butler: You found God, sir?
William Wilberforce: I think He found me.
-Amazing Grace (2006)

The simple heart

In 1991 a census was taken on “Population and Housing”. It was found that the urban population was at 62% nationwide . It is now 2008, 17 years later. Today, Malaysia ranks 34^th in the list of countries based on GDP (Gross Domestic Product), suggesting an average financial standing and economic size. We have a commendable economy, but statistics aside, the trend of modernization is catching on….

Half a century ago, our forefathers toiled in labor to bring the people out the jungles into the cities. Immigrants, traveling with the clothes on their backs were pioneers of a sacrificing generation; one that left their homes to give comfort to their future offspring. This was the typical vision for the generation then: the legacy of a better economic and financial state for the future generations. With every generation that has passed, most of us have now stepped closer to the ‘city’, if we haven’t already entered. Success stories are being written of rural boys working to the top in the capital city, aboriginals obtaining scholarships, students setting records of A’s achieved in national exams, the rich becoming richer, the good becoming the best. But something is missing.

We ARE becoming better. But only in a certain way that the world holds. There is a problem with moving up- we forget there is essentially no ‘up’.

Perhaps this is why the hegemony of power will always be controlled by an elite group; call it what you want: politicians, bishops, kings, tycoons, overstaying MIC leaders. This thirst for greatness ironically puts us further away from it; for in every class in society, the chase for it has made men leave many things behind.

Among these things is the simple heart.

In the midst of all the seriousness of life or situations we ‘wake up’ to or grow to discover, there is always a voice that wakes me up in the morning; one which sings in an off-key set of notes; but never fails to remind me that for all that this life could ever offer, there’s nothing quite like simplicity. At times, this voice would be accompanied with a three-stringed worn-out guitar, strummed out of rhythm with a broken melody.

As I learn more about a complex world in the newspapers, I am reminded of a simple soul who lives under the same roof as I do; who at the sound of the auto-gate opening, rushes to the windows where she waves to her father returning from work with a broad smile on her face. Oblivious to the complexities of the world and the ambitions many of the people of her age would be growing up with should she be normal, her life is pure and speaks a message of its own, unlike the superficial lives everywhere. I wonder whether she is in fact abnormal, or just really, the rest of the world.

It is at these times that I look at her and I know that she’s a living reminder that God made us all simple at heart, and more do I understand the truth that the ‘least’ become the greatest in His kingdom. There are more deserving lives to be mentioned in my writings (one as hers) and more around us to emulate, apart from great men who started wars they died in, and big names that people forget when other big names replace them. There are more ways to ‘be better’. There is another race for ‘greatness’ which takes a reverse route that we wouldn’t commonly take, in which the contestants almost seem to run the wrong way, as the participants of the world would see.

Am I anti-progress, to say we must shun great plans for ourselves and stop looking for the best in the world? No. Progress will find us with time. The best of the world is in the simplest of places, and the greatest ‘plans’ are ones made without a ‘my’ in front. In all that we awaken to, from the political, economic, academic- we must never abandon a simple heart; one that statistics will never record, but lives remember.

Quick post

To do justice to this perpetually banal, inactive page, here are some recent pictures taken:

A 'bridge' at the shore of Kuala SelangorJesmond, my cell member and Jonathan at his house in Kajang.
The MCF booth during CNS week.Cheeky Josh Evans, who asked that the picture be taken like this
The infamous Mat Cemerlangs during a BN ceramah at my housing area.

I must add that the crowd increased dramatically by 4-5 times during the next night, at the opposition ceramah for Elizabeth Wong from PKR.

A quick look at the Five Immediate Actions she would take once elected (for the uninitiated, she won the Bukit Lanjan seat), which were presented that night:

1)The initiation of the Private Member Bill, which will ensure freedom of information for the residents
2)No more demolition of places of worship
3)The Sungai Buloh Forest Reserve to be re-gazetted
4)The crime rate to be worked at and reduced
5)Local council elections to be held

(Thoughts on these in next post, due to entirely different nature of subject and time)

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"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day"


There couldn't be a better place to be in, I still believe. There is much to be glad about. There is much to appreciate...our leaders, our advisors, our companions, our privileges. There is much to hope for.

Do have a good week, everyone.

The national dream

Long have I desired to write something to this effect, after watching the many hands raised up when I asked the Form 2 students while teaching as a temporary teacher, "Who plans to leave Malaysia when you grow up?", after observing the response I got (and still get) for wanting to "study and stay in Malaysia if I can and God wills", after hearing my contemporaries scheming and planning to attain PRs in other countries as soon as they can, and after listening to so many snide remarks about our nation's incompetence, uttered not out of concern for the disadvantaged or underprivileged, but out of pure disdain for this place.

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My national dream is to see a renewed love for this land.

Days ago, the nation went to the ballot boxes and cemented their decisions on paper. The sentiment for change was in the air, we were gearing towards a democratic revolution, we pushed against the walls of oppression and then...The walls came, crashing down. 

Of all of the enormous, ambitious and repeatedly mentioned hopes that have been re-birthed along with the political awakening of my fellow Malaysians, there is a national dream that has yet been realized- one that threatens to destroy the very foundations of this country should it prevail, and more importantly, one that plagues my generation.

How many times has it been said time and time again, that we were fooled to love! We were trained to lift our right hands up to recite the national oath every week, we were made to stand to sing the national anthem every Monday of our schooling years, we were indoctrinated with ideals and notions of the country in our very textbooks, we were encouraged to proudly swing the “Jalur Gemilang” on the National Day; we were taught to love this land, even made to as it seems. But soon after, my generation grew up, and growing up, we saw more.

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Untainted by the doctrine of nationalism and unbiased to certain ideals, the higher education we pursued opened our eyes to the ugliness of our home. The more we saw, the more we hated, and the more we hated, the more resolved we became, "to leave this screwed up place as soon as I can and get a better life where my race will not be discriminated and my privileges will not be based on the colour of my skin". Like grapes dried by the sun, we became as prunes - tired and cynical of the system, eager to escape a desert of injustice, incompetence and corruption.

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And so I ask, what good is change in the system if our hearts can't love a nation whose rulers would inevitably rise and fall with time? If our patriotism depends on the names of the leaders who govern this land, it could very well waver in a matter of 4 years.

Hence, my dream for a renewed love for this nation. Not a tolerance for corruption, nor a liking for sin, but a steadfast, stubborn choice to stand for this place and the insistence that 'where my destiny began is where my destiny lies'. A renewed love for this nation, which, isn't dependent on the abilities of its rulers or the times, rather a willingness to be counted as one of its citizens, and if so be, mocked at for being 'patriotic for a lost cause' when all others have lost faith in it.

It is the firm idealistic stand that beauty is not to be a reason for love- because Malaysia may very well be 'ugly' in many ways. It is the appreciation of a new, unbiased view of the country and the choice to love despite what one sees. Most importantly, it is the passion for our birthplace and identity. Sure, we were taught to love this place, and even indoctrinated to, as some may say,

but if we, who realize all these things and can now see for ourselves...

if we, who know the shortcomings of this land and no longer recite oaths or sing songs ignorantly…

…knowing that love is a choice to be made, not a passion to be forced - love anyway, then change has truly come to Malaysia.

Lose to gain

If time could be seen in a line, and just, through some form of miracle one could walk down that line of time, and see, how the hardship, struggles and pain of his present circumstances helped chart out the path which eventually led to his future; if he could for a moment meet his 'past' self, and stir, shake and encourage him to toil on just because he knows his present glory began in that moment in time of difficulty, just because it began in the past and he knows how the story would end...the possibilities are endless.

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And yet, faith is hoping in something yet unseen because life was fashioned such that one would only be able to look back - down the line of time - after he had traversed it before. In this way he will only know 'too late', in celebration of the right thing done, or in despair and regret for mistakes in the past.

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If there were no struggles, how could 'happily ever after' be appreciated or even realized? Beauty would be born in a palace, the Beast would have never been cursed and the story of "Beauty and the Beast" would be a one-page bore. If there were no tears, how would the struggle of Wilberforce and the abolition of the slavetrade inspire people bent on making a difference? If there were no toil and turmoil, how would Gandhi's tale serve as a testimony of human perseverance and hope?

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Needs serve to remind us that we can't do it alone. Perhaps our generation has been too caught up with making our lives comfortable, not realizing we have made ourselves unable to appreciate it all. We have made ourselves numb, in pursuit of happiness. How ironic, that our self-sustenance has backfired.
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.Before the appreciation of a met need is felt, there must be a need to be met. Thank God for needs. They remind us we're only mortal.

On teaching and such (pictures)

Firstly, a heartfelt thanks for the great, great farewell, cards and gifts! In reply to the messages in the chatbox: Thanks Min Ern, Gary, Chanel, Heidy and Justin Wong. I will try to stop by whenever I can. Thank you all for the appreciation, for almost making me cry (keyword being 'almost' ;P), for being the great students any teacher could ask for and for the well wishes. I know, as my holidays come to a close and as the new semester in university begins the time spent teaching temporarily in school was not to waste. Some pictures to remember...

(click to enlarge)

With the other temporary teachers, (from left) Tysern, Meng Kuan, Chong Xian and Patrick for supper.The boys of 2 Keruing during recess.

At the field with the students having P.E.

The boys in the SMDJ Christian Fellowship whom I spoke to on the 15th of Feb, in conjunction with Valentine's Day

2 Batai and the farewell they put up.

There are many more pictures, in fact, but alas, I have to rush for time...

"To everything there is a season. A time for every purpose under heaven"

May you find yours. Have a week week to all!

Penang

Here's hoping you had a good CNY break.. Just some pictures taken during the trip up north, with my new camera (which my sister thinks seems to follow me everywhere I go now ;>). I'll let the pictures do the talking

Queens Bay

My cousin, Gavin, with Claudia and I

Abby, who enjoyed her time tremendously (eating & swimming)

Blowing the candles on my twentieth birthday cake, with the rest of the family members behind the camera.

Family time is indeed, always a good time. A little note of appreciation for all the birthday wishes and greetings. With possibly more than a quarter of my life passed (and that is if my life extends that long) I am more than convinced many things in life are temporal and superficial, and how men in all their folly and frailty have always chased what they could never keep- and lost what they ought to keep, yet God, in His grace has always been waiting at the other end. There is much to do...

...and much to arrive at.

Have a good week- back to school and work ;>

For the SMDJ-ians

Some may know that for the past three weeks, I have been teaching as a temporary English teacher in five Form 2 classes and one Form 1 class (for Moral) in SMDJ. To say that the job is interesting would be an understatement; it has opened my eyes to several things, made me understand what MY teachers went through to educate me, created doors for me to speak into younger peoples' lives, shown me the rewards of coming to a class awaiting not just a session of academic learning but one eager to know more about the world that awaits them outside...and has reinforced in me: how humble and 'mediocre' jobs such as the teaching profession has more meaning than most of the jobs we have been made to, or have ourselves been dreaming about. With down to about one and a half weeks more of working as a temporary teacher before the university semester resumes, I know I WILL miss these people. For all their enthusiasm, humour, freshness and laughter.
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Anyway, this post is for the students who read the blog- and find nothing interesting/relevant to read, or like one student complained, "Teacher, I don't understand what you write in your blog!".
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One day while teaching at a form 2 class, I asked each of the students to write something secretive/interesting/personal about themselves on a piece of paper, anonymously. I wanted to prove a point that people do not seem to be how they appear to be always, and more often than not, are just 'putting up a show' and have many things to hide. And so we had a "classroom-'PostSecret'-session". Below are some of the statements written on those pieces of paper:
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"I tell my brother my secrets before I go to bed."
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"I sometimes feel as if I'm too inadequate to live up to my siblings."
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"I used to play princess and prince with a guy and I still wish I could do that."
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"I'm sick of being nerdy-looking."
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"I want people to be fair and not always give everything to popular kids when they don't deserve it."
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"I play computer games without permission when my parents are out."
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"Accept me in your Friendster please!" (This one made me really amused)
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"I don't like the prefectorial board a lot."
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Just some pictures of some of the familiar characters in the stories I've been telling in classes:

From left: Ian ( "Follow the trail"), Lit Rong, Myself, Satchid (Car Hijacker), Ernest, Guang Yu and Han Sheng (and his trademark pose).
From left: Joshua ('steel chair and lift' story) and myself.

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Here's an upcoming event at my church this Saturday. Do let me know if you're interested to come and check it out... it can be arranged


Also on the subject of Valentine's Day, I will be speaking at the SMDJ CF (Christian Fellowship Society) on the 15th of February (Friday), on "Love" (it's one day after Valentine's Day as you know). Incidentally it will be my last day of teaching, so do come to CF if you're around. Would be great to have you guys around. =)


Keep enjoying school! Have a great week ahead.

When all is said and done

There. Is. More.

..To this beauty, glory, youth, acknowledgment, prominence, excellence, image, wealth, health, happiness, laughter, peace, prosperity, comfort, luxury that we enjoy

..To this chase for more of what we don't really need, to this amassing of more of what we cannot keep.


Just to be simply... unimpressed, sometimes. How we need to learn how to live again!

The prospect of God

"There is an emptiness and a loneliness that an atheist feels, which people of faith cannot understand. The world is absurd, an accident. Science has, or will have, all the answers, but life has no real meaning or significance. Death is final. You can have influence and an impact on the world through your children; you can do well, be remembered in the history books for hundreds, even thousands of years; when the sun dies mankind may colonize other star systems, maybe even other galaxies. But ultimately, even if it takes 15 Billion years, the universe itself will die, or collapse into a black hole or whatever, and the end is absolute nothingness, the only thing that is infinite is a void. Life, then, is meaningless and death frightening. Truth and morality can become relative, which may lead to moral confusion, hedonism, and worse…”

-Unknown source

I do believe purpose in life and God are inseparable. I see it more with every new piece of news pertaining to corruption, death, tragedy and immorality; more with the realization that no amount of success can buy you definite satisfaction and fulfillment (even significance); more with how the world will keep chasing the wind and be swept by it- never knowing the vanity of it all; more with the frailty of life; more with how more people need more love than ever before.
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If God does not exist, we cease to have a reason to exist- and should there be a reason, that reason in itself could never last more than a lifetime. It simply dies with us and our mortal bodies. But if He does, which is a compelling possibility we must stop to consider, then the notion of life after death must be considered as well, because we WILL go somewhere. Sometimes, all that stands before man and God is a simple realization.
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'God' is just too big a prospect to ignore.